Proverbs 5:17 teaches that the good things of marriage belong to one person, not shared with outsiders. It is a call to loyalty, to keeping intimacy and trust inside a committed relationship. The words come from a father speaking to his son in the book of Proverbs, a wisdom collection traditionally attributed to Solomon.
Let them be for yourself alone, not for strangers with you.
Proverbs 5:17 (WEB)
What Proverbs 5:17 Means
The verse is a picture drawn from water. In the ancient Near East, a family’s cistern or well was precious, since water was limited and had to be guarded. The father tells his son that intimacy is like that private water supply: it belongs to the household and should not be drawn off by people who have no claim to it. The phrase “for yourself alone” makes the point of exclusivity plain.
The second half, “not for strangers with you,” names the threat. A stranger here is anyone outside the covenant of marriage, someone who would take what is not theirs to take. The verse does not describe every feeling or temptation a person might have, but it does draw a clear boundary: what is shared in covenant love stays within that covenant.
What the verse does not promise is that faithfulness is always easy or that a faithful marriage will be free of struggle. It states a principle about loyalty and where a person’s deepest devotion should rest. Proverbs as a whole speaks in broad patterns of wisdom rather than guarantees, so this verse is best read as a wise direction for life.
The Context of Proverbs 5:17
Proverbs 5 is part of a series of speeches in which a parent instructs a young man about the dangers of sexual immorality. The adulteress in the chapter represents a seductive and destructive path, and the father urges his son to avoid her and to find satisfaction in his own marriage. Verse 17 sits at the center of this appeal, which is why it reads as a positive counterpart to the warnings around it.
Just before verse 17, the father speaks of drinking from your own cistern and your own well. Just after it, in verse 18, he tells the son to rejoice in the wife of his youth. Seen this way, the verse is not a bare prohibition but part of a warm invitation to find joy and blessing in faithful love. The surrounding words turn a warning into an encouragement toward a settled and grateful devotion.
Key Phrases in Proverbs 5:17
Hebrews 13:4
Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the bed be undefiled: but God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterers.
(WEB)
This verse honors marriage as something to be held in esteem by all and keeps the marriage bed pure, connecting the same covenant faithfulness that Proverbs 5:17 describes.
Malachi 2:14
Yet you say, ‘Why?’ Because the LORD has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously, though she is your companion, and the wife of your covenant.
(WEB)
Malachi speaks of the covenant between husband and wife as sacred and binding, which deepens the reason for loyalty and exclusive devotion within marriage.
A Short Prayer From Proverbs 5:17
Lord, you know how easily my heart wanders and how quickly I can reach for comfort that does not belong to me. Help me to honor the covenant of my marriage and to keep the closest parts of my life within the love you have given me. Guard my eyes, my words, and my thoughts from what would draw me away. Let my joy be found in faithfulness, and let my home be a place of trust and peace. Amen.